Archive for January, 2009

Flirted with and propositioned…

Saturday, January 31st, 2009

Okay, it’s not as bad as it sounds, but I signed up to play some online games on Nabisco.com, and they have advertisements that come up in between rounds, and I swear one of them said I should enter a chance to LICK the Mannings, as in the football players, Peyton and Eli–hmm interesting…but I digress, the actual advert was for entering an OREO licking contest AGAINST them. Hmm. Not nearly as fun.

Also, someone in the grocery store said he wanted to come to my house for dinner, what I was having looked better than what he was having. For once I actually had a comeback, maybe it was lame, but it was a comeback nonetheless, my answer was, ‘well okay, but you have to bring your own car’ –told you it was lame. All along I was thinking, gee he is older, like 40, and then I was like, yeah you moron and you’re almost 30. And alone in a grocery store and you’re hot (okay, not really, but just pretend), so why wouldn’t he flirt with you? My husband thought it was funny. My daughter stayed asleep through the story.

Need new monster/truck sleeper

Friday, January 30th, 2009

hpim0024Sigh, did I ever post the cute outfit that Keeley’s daddy picked out for her before she was born? He wanted to buy a newborn size, but decided a 0-3 month size was a lot better choice. Now at 3 months, she’s definitely grown out of it. We happened to find it at a Target store. I searched online and used keywords and still couldn’t find any more. So, if you were able to find a 3-6 or 6-9, or even a 12 month size in a store near you, I would pay you the cost plus shipping. Here’s a picture of what I’m talking about. And no, nothing else will do. No dump trucks, fire trucks or anything else. Just this one. The brand is Circo and it was hanging on a rack, I think it was in the boy’s section as it was blue. We got it oh, last year I guess in the summer. So it might be on clearance.

Eight is…14?

Friday, January 30th, 2009

Read this, I’ll be waiting.. stop reading it when you get disgusted.

Okay, now seriously? You already have 6 little kids, you live at home with your parents and somehow you get 8 kids implanted into your womb? Oh yes and you already filed for bankruptcy and foreclosed on your house. Fabulous.  You set yourself up for a lifetime of medical bills for 8 severely premature, most likely severely disabled children. What on earth would make a person do that?

On the other hand? SHAME on CBS for providing the mother’s name. Kind of easy to figure out who the lady who gave birth is, if you give out HER mom’s name. Jerks.

Edit: Not that I don’t think people can have as many kids as they want, but common sense would tell you that you can’t afford that, especially if you’re sponging off of your parents and your dad has to leave the country to make money to support you. Really.

Thursday Ponder

Thursday, January 29th, 2009

Does ANYONE really believe Blagojevich? Really? Anyone?

chirp chirp chirp

chirp chirp chirp

Games we play #792

Thursday, January 29th, 2009

This one is called, “I can’t cry when I’m smiling” — just be sure to laugh REALLY hard along with this one. When the baby starts get get all pouty faced for no reason, tickle her cheeks and say, “come on baby smile, smile, you can do it smile, there you go, I know you can, smile!” All of this with a big smile on  your face. Talk about a confused kid. They will eventually give in and be happy, because you literally, no matter how hard you try, literally cannot cry with a smile on your face. Just ask Keeley. Parents 1, Keeley 0

Kids really do that sort of thing?

Tuesday, January 27th, 2009

Okay I was watching Jay Leno the other night and Cuba Go0ding Jr was on there. He told of story of having to take his kid (who already had a broken arm) back into the hospital because he was bleeding from odd orifices. Anyway, the point is that they actually videotaped the kid doing what he was doing (don’t ask why they didn’t stop him, that’s beside the point) and showed it to the doctor to ward off any potential neglective parenting calls.

So what was the kid doing? In a cast? To make him bleed from odd orifices? Jumping on a trampoline and doing blackflips, with ROLLERBLADES on. Picture that and realize how smart your kid is because they DON’T do sh.. um stuff like that. At least while you are watching.

Just goes to show that money and sense don’t always coincide.

Puppy dog naps

Tuesday, January 27th, 2009

Okay, seriously. Under NO circumstances, should you actually consider giggling when you’re trying to get your baby to go back to sleep. You won’t be able to contain yourself. You will wake the baby up, if only briefly.

It is rather difficult, though, when you put your hand on your baby’s head, and stroke her down her nose, between her eyes, and put her to sleep just like you can a puppy, to not giggle about it.

Dr visit

Monday, January 26th, 2009

One word. Ouch!

Daddy didn’t like the shots too much, mom pretended she wasn’t screaming and the nurse was done in under 60 seconds, bandaids and all. She was good. It took less than 5 minutes to calm her down and get her out of there, which was nice. I think next time we will pay the co-pay ahead of time so we can walk right out, if possible. The only real problem is that after she got home, was in her swing a little bit, nursed, and sat with dad for a while, she got really cranky. Unconsolably cranky. We took the bandaids off just in case they were rubbing, etc. etc. We read the doctor’s office book for suggestions on tylenol (grape, blech!), double checked the dose, we both verified it was correct, noted the time and painted the inside of her mouth with it. We finally took off the regular clothes, put the pjs on, and besides standing in front of the stove vent and swaying back and forth until she got sleepy, her daddy faithfully pretended to ‘eat’ her stars on her mobile. Nom nom nom. Much to her apparent delight, she calmed down and went to sleep. Upon which mom and dad both got some chocolate ice cream.

Incidentally she also got an oral vaccination, which she seemed very confused about. I asked if it tasted like anything and the nurse didn’t know. I find that odd. I do happen to know that whether you get amoxicillin for kids or cats its bubblegum flavored. I had to ask…and I still think grape medicine is nasty. Hopefully Keeley won’t know the difference. Now whether she had a fever or pain or both, she at least got some relief.

Monster Baby

Monday, January 26th, 2009

I’m not sure the size of the average 3 month old, but ours is a monster.

Her 2 month check-up (a month late due to changing doctors and the holidays) entailed the doctor being really impressed with her. Particularly her size and development relative to being a few weeks early. He basically said we could subtract a month in development for her and that’s what we typically could expect, but that she is really developing on a normal 3 month old schedule anyway.

Her stats:     24 1/2 inches long, 13 lbs 15.5 oz, 15 3/4 in head circ, all of which puts her in the 90th percentile for height and 95 percentile for weight. As I frequently say while pumping or watching her eat. MOO!

How to stock your house for your first baby

Friday, January 23rd, 2009

Feel free to stockpile non-perishables a little bit at a time each month of your pregnancy, but make sure…At least a month before your due date…

Have a crate of items you use most often and/or might need. Buy plastic utensils and paper plates, even if you don’t usually use them. Paper bowls are great for cereal too.

We had unfortunate circumstances, but we found that we could subsist on some frozen microwave meals (after a few days we started eating 2 apiece, so consider hungry man or non-diet ones)–but if you can, arrange for people to bring you food or make and freeze things yourself ahead of time, or buy items that you can heat and eat. Canned soup, ramen, microwave macaroni, it doesn’t matter those first few days, as long as it is calories. Add some fruit cups. Oh and keep the salt and/or pepper handy. Those instant taters can be kind of bland. Make sure to take into account if you and/or your spouse is going back to work within a month of your due date. If you are, add more meals to the stockpile, or plan for your hubby to grocery shop after 2 weeks. You’ll need diapers anyway. Be sure to put beer on the list for him.

Also, stock the freezer with candy bars. The multipack boxes on the candy aisle are much cheaper than buying them at the checkout. You WILL need the pick-me-up on those first visits to the pediatrician. Stow a couple in your diaper bag, because you WILL forget to eat and those can be lifesavers.

Our first few meals consisted of a zapped dinner and a candy bar. It was the only thing keeping us going. I’m lying, it’s still keeping us going. We ran out last night (I’m nursing, so the calories float magically away, if you bottle feed, forget the candy bars past week 2)…

Stock your pantry with water, your favorite caffeine free sodas, and juice that can stay on the shelf. The week the baby is due go ahead and buy a huge jug of orange juice and a couple of cartons of milk. Indulge in the hershey’s syrup, you’ll drink a lot more milk that way.

If anyone asks you if they can bring anything, say yes, and then go to your fridge and see what is empty. Same with your pantry. Ask for that. Most likely you will run out of something each day. Keep a list on the fridge if that helps you remember.

If you haven’t had kids before, and you didn’t get loaded with diapers at the baby shower, buy a newborn or size 1 pack of the major brands. We came home with nearly a full container of huggies, but our baby leaked right through them. We kept buying them anyway, and then switched to Luvs, which have been remarkably better. We were out of anything else and went to the grocery store and all we found in the correct size were pampers. I’d rate them halfway between the other 2. Like the huggies, our baby felt sweaty or damp in them. Not sure if the diaper leaked or if it was just too much ‘padding’. Anyway, try them all, you’ll go through tons with a newborn anyway.

Buy several boxes of kleenex, like one for each room of the house. Trust me.

Make sure you have plenty of hand soap and that all the containers are filled. Ditto with clean towels, or paper towels for the first few weeks. Also, if you don’t always have about 3 days worth of clean clothes, you’re in deep trouble. You will need at least something to go to the hospital in, something to come home from the hospital in, and a clean set for the next morning, as you won’t be thinking of anything else before then. You wake up are realize you must wear the same clothes or dig into your husband’s stash. Trust me, it’s better to keep your own clothes clean.

Take stock of the baby’s clothes, but don’t wash them all. Essential the first few days especially are those little tshirts that snap OR the sleepers that snap or zip. Have 5 or 6 of those on hand in case of accidents. They can be pjs for the first 3 months after you get used to the newborn wobbliness and diaper changes. Because pulling a onesie over a newborn’s head is kind of like being sucked through a rubber hose. Don’t ask me why. It just is.